Facebook: Stalking Made Easy
August 15, 2008, 3:56 pm
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True Stalker

True Stalker

You’re a facebook stalker, I’m a facebook stalker, let’s just admit we’ve got a little stalker in all of us.  It used to be that you had to wait outside someones house for hours on end, snag their mail, and call their home in the middle of the night to have any clue what was going on in someones life without talking them.  Now, thanks to technology, there are very few secrets.  So, here’s some Facebook stalking confessions and I challenge you to share  yours:

High School Friends:  I can’t tell you the number of people I’ve added that I knew in some form or another in high school.  If I gave them a call, we’d have to sit through an hour of awkward conversation and probably would garner a few details.  With facebook, I can tell you everything my old friends have been doing in some form or another.  You can find out where they went to school what their job is now.  You can find out if they’ve been dating anyone seriously.  That secrets easy to find, just look through some of their photo albums.  If the same person of the opposite sex (most cases) appears in more than five pics, their likely sharing more than digital image space.  The same way you can find out who they still hang out with high school and who they don’t.  In particular, they’re not hanging out with you anymore because you’re not tagged in any of those photos.

Ex-Girlfriends: Girlfriends in my lifetime, I won’t act like there are a whole lot of them in my memories, but there are some.  It’s fun to peruse their pics and their posts to see what they’re up to now.  And there is no small comfort taken in finding they’ve married a guy that looks like he got beaten by an ugly stick.  You can find out if they’ve changed at all, or a warm feeling to see they’re married and have three kids already.  All good.  You can also find out how much an ex-girlfriend really hates you and won’t let you add her as a friend on facebook (that’ll be a post for another day).

Potential Girlfriends:  For work, I’m in the Competitive Intelligence business where I’m trained to examine behavior and other bits of information to make a determination about future events with regards to a particular company.  Applying that kind of tradecraft to dating makes life a little bit more interesting.  Case in point, you meet a girl, you want to know what she’s like, who her friends are, and if she’s as cool as she seemed to be last night when you got her number.  Almost like running your own background check.  I’m sure for all of you that open up your profile on a network, pretty much everyone can run this little check on you.  And let me tell you, some people they seem normal at night, but you’ve got to wonder about them in the day time.  Some pictures that you see or things that they write, well, it does add a touch of flavor to their personalities.

So, I confess, I’ve facebook stalked and from what I know I haven’t committed any felonies and I’m not going to be waiting outside anyone’s house.  In fact, most facebook stalking, mine included, occurs between the hours of 8 AM – 5 PM when you get bored and need your own version of a smoke break.  So, happy stalking.